no soldier no lover
no father no mother
not a lonely child
in the up and in the bedroom
a black and white of the bride and the groom
will bring me to my knees
with the colorized bad dream
that takes its place on
ash wednesday

white noise and love
will be my only drug
on this day nine
suns away
from that sad sad saturday
when fire my friend
fire my villian
you take away yesterday
to give to me today
when nothing’s free no now it’s
ash wednesday

so each day is ash wednesday
all this life is ash wednesday

all the doors are shut
and the windows barely opened up
the fires all around
it’s the ending of the drought
and we are ready now
for tear gas clouds
on my mind
come on fill the house
finally and weep
for it’s king and queen sleep
both now
in the arms of
ash wednesday
ash wednesday

Choosing Holyoke as a place to make our home has been a wonderful decision so far. And it’s a decision made even more wonderful when friends buy houses within walking distance. Jennifer and Scott celebrated their recent purchase with a housewarming yesterday — it included delicious pancakes and the music of The Primate Fiasco. Photos here.

I am not sure what has happened to me this week, although I have some ideas. The editor is out this week so things are kind of nuts at work. I moved my bedroom into the smaller, greener room. It’s more peaceful back there, but I think I’m still getting used to the new vibe. I also think that the air conditioner in that room is a bit louder than the one in the other bedroom. My new plan of attack is to cool that room down before I go to bed and then turn off the air conditioner when I’m ready for sleep. If that doesn’t work I’ll have to ask Matt to swap the air conditioners. I don’t want it to come to this, though.

But do you know that feeling of sleeplessness? Of your mind racing with all of the thoughts of things you have to do? Or you are willing yourself to relax, which just makes it worse because you’re just reminded that you’re very much NOT relaxed.

Wow, an AT&T commercial with Mates of State. How weird!

The past few weekends have been full. earlier in the month, Matt and I went to Pennsylvania and did all of the things we set out to do. I have to say that my favorite was riding our bikes around my hometown. It was nice to see Palmyra on a bicycle. What a nice place to have grown up I’ve decided. And last weekend matt played a show in Brooklyn and then we stayed at his grandma’s on long island. I beat them both at Scrabble. Twice. I’m just sayin’

One thing I need to do, though, is get my piano out of that house. Back around Christmas when we talked about his retirement we made arrangements to split the cost of moving it up here to Massachusetts. Now that I have a house of my own, this is a plan that I can realistically carry out.

I can already see it in here. I have plenty of room and think it will help fill up this space quite nicely. I don’t know what else I’ll do with it. I know at least one person who can play it, and there are piano books in the bench that I can dust off and try out. I used to play when I was a teenager, but gave it up because I didn’t have the drive within myself to practice.

I don’t know why I’m blogging about this, but I am excited about having it back and then figuring out what it means to have it.

What have I been up to. The highlight recently was seeing the Winterpills at Iron Horse last Saturday. Philip and Flora and Dennis and Dave and Brian created brilliant arrangements for the new songs and assembled a
distinguished and talented cast of guest appearances, culminating in an
amazing “Folded Cloth” closer. I brought some
friends along who didn’t really know a lot about the band and I hope
are now converts to the church of Winterpills.

Seriously, best band ever.

It’s been a month or so of lots and lots of changes as
many of you know. Not just the house but many other things. I’m not too keen on talking about my personal life, but as a newly single person, my focus
has been on remembering who I am, trying to have a good time and spend more time with friends. There have been some dark, lonely,
uncertain nights.
There have also been some great moments, like Winterpills night,
dark dining room night, Vietnamese food, the housewarming and so many more.

Presently, my goal is to save money towards getting the house electrical upgrade and work has been intense as we are covering high school basketball finals.

Blech, I’m getting so journaly.

I like listening to it while I’m working. I have about 30 songs on there right now and am adding more daily.